Does this lipstick make me look like a badass?...

… because I'm pretty sure it does. Even though I'm making a scrunchy face.  And I look a bit like a maroon-coloured bat… and I'm wearing one of SB's silly old t-shirts that I sliced up because scissors are sometimes fun to play with and I didn't have an old shirt of  my own to cut up… 

Anywho… I've been doing quite a bit of reflecting lately and I've come up with a couple of interesting things that I need to bounce around cyberspace for a bit.  

1) I am SO incredibly right brained (98%… I took the quiz… which makes no sense because I'm a Libra… that means I should be balanced… more on that later), that I think everyone I consider a close friend is about 99% my polar opposite.  My two best friends in the states?  One is going for her MD/PhD. and plays with stem cells for about 12 hours a day and the other one is literally the ONLY reason I survived math in junior high.  I was royally screwed and had to repeat algebra when she moved to Germany before our freshman year of high school.  When I look at people I've dated, I've got  a financial planner, a cop, a doctor, and a computer scientist (is that the right term for someone who majored in computer science?).  I can't tell you how many times I've wished and wished and wished that I was surrounded by people who paint, make music, twirl a lot, sing, and love to take photos, but when I think about the time that I spend in creative circles like this, I remember how drained and angry I feel at the end of these experiences.  Perhaps I need to work on my left brain skills…

2) I am a Libra.  Now, I'm really not ALL that into the whole horoscope thing (though at various points during my developmental years, I religiously logged into AOL first thing in the morning ("neeee… neeeee… neeeee… neeeee…. nurrrrr… neeee… nurrr… neeee… nurrr" (dial up, right?)) to check my horoscope and then planned my day around it), but I can take or leave them… I guess.  What I'm getting at is that according to anything ever written about a Libra, I should have something resembling balance within my being, but for real, I'm a walking contradiction.  It's starting to get on my nerves. 

3)  I am getting dangerously close to turning 30, and I have only the vaguest idea of who I actually am. If you'd asked me when I was 18, where I thought I'd be when I was 28, I would most definitely have told you that I would have been married straight out of college, started working a fabulous fashion job, bought a giant condo in a big city and been working on my second kiddo.  In reality?  I have still yet to work a salaried job, the thought of buying anything to live in is terrifying and unrealistic, and I can't even start to think about marriage or kids.  On the flip side, I did put myself through grad school, moved to Europe, own two cars, and have been to about 35 countries, which I never thought I'd do… sooooo…. 

4)  I need to talk about Emma Watson, because I'm venting and something has just come to my attention.  Emma Watson is going to play Belle in the live-action rendition of "Beauty and the Beast."  Now, I don't really ever say "hate" or the b-word, but grrrrrr!   I want to use them in the same sentence and apply it to Emma.  But not in a bad way.  Ok.  Sort of in a bad way.  I have an issue with Emma Watson.  It all started when I was 12-ish and Harry Potter was going to become a movie.  Since my aunt had been bringing me HP books from England for several years and I felt so ahead of the newborn American HP lovers, I felt highly possessive of HP and decided that I wanted to audition for the movie.  There was a time when you could record an audition tape and send it in… which I did… and was promptly rejected, because I am not British.  Then Emma was cast and a great big green flower of envy started growing on my heart.  I overcame it for a while and tried to really love Ems.  When she got a pixie cut and was promptly dubbed "Sweetheart of the World" or some such title proclaiming universal love, I figured I'd get a pixie cut.  I looked like a pre-pubescent boy.  I let my hair grow and developed real appreciation for Emma, but now she's been cast as my favourite Disney princess… and I'm not sure how to take it… 

5) I really want to see the sun.  It's been about 3 weeks since it made its last appearance.  I'm beginning to doubt that it still exists, which is highly likely to be the reason behind this rant.  Sorry.  It's Mother Nature's fault.  

Necklace ℅ Primlark

Sweater ℅ Deb

Shorts ℅ SammyDress

Boots ℅ Deb

Crescent moon ring ℅ Twisted Whimsy

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